Song in my mind ~ ***k it - Eamon

Interesting.... it seems that all the pond scum wants to make a journal entry before years end....

The savage just called... same old BS that I felt bad for in August. That ain't working and won't work ever again...... WTF... hehe.. I just told him no. I can't do it. I'm not STUPID ... He can get his sorry butt out to Oklahoma, he can find a way back. Rose will chuckle when I tell her. However, I was correct in all things he took back in September, and this being able to say no I'm not gonna be used is very empowering... I was going to go out tonight in State College cause its been soooooo boring this weekend for on-call... but I just decided to watch VH1'1 100 top teen idols... hehe... and this phone call..... Well.. the area code did throw me off a little I was talking to a Justin that I've well... know intimately... and we are "I guess" planning a trip to NYC in Jan... so I thought it might have been him... but nope... I feels good to say I'm not putting on the cape, and I'm not going to be Superman, or Suckerman. As I said to my friend Tim.. Sucks to be him.

Oh well... a "Few Good Men" is on... I'm out of here...

Song in my mind ~ Wicked Little Town - Hedwig and the Angry Inch

Hey, Happy Holidays everyone…

Not much going on… work has slowed down, and I think I did good at getting everyone a decent gift for Christmas. Mom I did really good, and step dad not bad.. the sister.. well I broke down and bought something for her but didn’t really want to. Mom thinks it went better this year, that’s all that counts…

Went up to Bradford Saturday – Sunday before Christmas, did the Xmas party for the School bus drivers up there, and it was nice to catch up with them all. Then I went to Charlies…. I heard the Troll aka The Black Hole of Humanity has been going back there. Oh well… I heard Dolly has even been behaving when he has been there. Which is good. I have no time for him, but the me that had emerged from that relationship is a stronger and better one… So… I might even behave myself if I ran into him… haha… oh well.. It seems the place he has been working at has been the center of a lot of illegal things, so I would assume he’s in the middle of it. Only thing that bugs me he did ask the bartender if he saw me lately. I just realized I don’t want him asking about me. He don’t have the right. He is pond scum, and that is it.

Hehe… LB news as well.. (no wonder I don’t go home that much) Well, he crashed his “sugar daddy’s” car into some trees and fled the scene, and come to find he hasn’t had a license for a some time…. And he wondered why I wouldn’t co-sign a loan for him. Oh well.. I did feel bad for him for a spilt second, he had a blog mention that his step dad killed his laptop in a drunken fit. But I see that he is just a user of people, although I have little pity for anyone that would give that screw up a car with no rules or something.. I’m a fool for love but that’s pushing it even for me.. haha…

Well… overall, I had a good year. Vacation in Atlantic City, Alex Bay, …. Some great weekends in NYC, 5 Broadway shows, probably a few other things I’m forgetting… The truck is gonna be a little more cheaper to fix, so a weekend getaway to Toronto is still possible before it gets too busy at work again. One of my friends at work is thinking about taking a amtrack from New York and doing a circle up to Buffalo to Cleveland down to Pittsburgh and back to New York, that sounds very interesting to me.

Nothing in the love department, but then again, after the savage, I’m ok with that to. I get to just have fun and don’t have to worry about anyone else. I keep telling myself that is a good stage to be in. The two people I have mentioned above right now wouldn’t be able to survive on there own. They are using and being used. I don’t have that that in my life. I feel bad for them. They both had a chance to have it good. But they are getting what they wanted. And I know I don’t want them or their life.

Best, J

Song in my Mind ~ Allentown - Billy Joel

Hey,

Not much going on right now, well as in the normal bitch sessions.... Just some commentary.

The job should start slowing down... the 100 days of hell are almost over, good in some ways.. not so in others... I'm going to be able to have some "quiet time".. just wish I had the truck fixed before it gets too quiet.

Speaking of "quiet time"... The Marviains (I know I killed that spelling) of Bethlehem PA totally changed the meaning of that... and yeah it means that.

First time I ever been to Bethlehem / Allentown... Allentown was nice... but I was really impressed with Bethlehem. A lot of neat culture, filled with alot of "arts"... I saw what they were doing down there and was really impressed. I'll keep that in the back of my mind if I ever move again... Which I rather not, even with the boring state of DuBois. Don't get me wrong... DuBois is great... just missing few things I'm missing...

But Bethlehem is really really interesting... so much I would consider visiting it on vacations sometime...

I also saw the "von Trappe Children"... well the Grand kids of one of the original kids... Very talented group. The girls blended very well... and Justin... wearing leaderhoseing (again a pretty good murder of a word) the 12 year old girls where loving those knees... (and the old ladies... haha) Amazing voice... he sang Consider Yerself, from Oliver, one of the best renditions I have ever heard. (and they play it all the freaken time on Sirius) He could sing like a kid, and then just change his style a little and get like a Josh Gorbin (with a German Accent even though he's from Vermont) Just amazing for his age... the "change" will be interesting how he handles it. Oh well... Once again I just wish I would have tackled a few more things when I was a kid. Or mastered... Oh well

Justin will do well....

I'm still in awe of Josh Gorbin and Jonny Lang.... my what I wouldn't do!!! haha....

I again have another str8 boi in my life drama (now rememeber the str8 bois down here are boring... Least the ones up in Bradford I had fun with.. haha) But I visited a gay bar in Altoona, and it was decent... Karaoke just plain sucked... no songs and the PA was horrible.... But thats where I met Eric the bartender.. very nice, his BF Barry, who was very nice and my type.... and Barry's brother Daniel who was gorgeous... and str8... however he was singing alot with me and touching me in a chummy sort a way.... he's lucky I have self control... haha.... But I was actually very witty that night... and I think I did good at being the me I want to be known as.....

Oh well... Str8 Jon I haven't heard nothing from... and the Other John we txt's a few times.. but then I see I was off his friends list so I don't have a clue... However it ends up its ok.. My motto has grown into... you don't have to like me, but I don't have to care... Yep.. I'm a bitch.. haha...

Oh well... enough for now.
j